South Africans going back

[Mertz]

The following was published on another website yahoo goups sasinnz.

On 2 October the husband published the following letter in Beeld ( daily afrikaans paper in Gauteng ) in reponse to the bly/gly (stay/go) debate:

 
Hi daar

Ons is nou ses maande in NZ.Dis glad nie maklik in die begin nie want jy
moet eers jou voete vind, ons kan verseker n boek skryf oor ons ervaring
hier,maar wat baie suid afrikaners nie verstaan nie is dat jy heeltemal
onder begin,jy is in n nuwe land en kan nie verwag om dadelik in n
bestuurpos in te loop nie,ons het ons self opgewerk deur die jare in SA,
ons sal dit hier ook doen,sal dit nog vinniger hier regkry want hier
bestaan nie iets soos regstellende aksie nie. My15 jarige seun was amper 2
jaar terug doodgeskiet, sy neef was gesteek met n mes reg voor hulle
huis.Hier kan my kinders winkels toe loop en hulle is veilig.Ons slaap
elke aand met n oop deur, waar ek in SA elke aand my man moes vra of al
die deure gesluit is en of die alarm aangeskakel is,elke geluid in die nag
het my wakker gemaak, nadat daar 2 uur die oggend in SA by ons ingebreek
is terwyl ons in die huis was,5 uur dieselfde oggend was hulle weer
terug.Ons verdra eerder die stres in die begin hier as wat ek in SA bly en
een van ons word vermoor.
Van die wat wil teruggaan,dink 2 keer ons weet van mense wat terug is,was
skaars 2 maande terug in SA waar die vrou deur 7 verkrag is.

As jou mindset nie reg is nie sal jy dit nie hier maak nie.


A month later he posted on the group site that they are leaving. When prompted by some members of the group for their reasons as this may assist prospective emmigrants his wife responded as follows:


Hi
Ek was bang om weer iets op die web te adverteer,as jy belang stel die
boeke is nog beskikbaar,ek wil nie mense negatief maak nie,wou nie eens
die e- mail nou stuur nie,maar lyk my ek het nie n keuse nie.Ons sou nooit
iets slegs gese het op die web nie,juis oor die rede vir die wat wil
oorkom,wou hulle nie negatief maak nie,maar dit is elkeen se reg om te
weet,dis nie jou gewone trek vanaf Kaap na Johannesburg nie,die move kan
of die beste ooit wees of jou hele lewe verander(nie ten goede nie).
Jy's reg, dis elkeen se eie besluit en ons het gese ons sal nooit die land
sleg maak nie,ja die veiligheid is hier en ek slaap soos n klip,waar ek in
SA vir elke geluid wakker geword het na hulle by ons ingebreek het terwyl
ons in die huis was.My kind is 3 jaar terug in SA met n wapen aangehou.Vir
baie werk dit,vir baie werk dit nie,dit hang alles van jouself af om te
kom kyk of dit vir jou gaan werk of nie,maar asseblief sorg dat julle nie
julle rande hier kom uitmors aan die begin nie,wat dis wat die meeste doen
as hulle hier land,hou eers julle geld net so in die bank indien jy moet
teruggaan ,want ja ek voel regtig jammer vir die baie wat wil teruggaan
maar nie die geld daarvoor het nie.Dankie tog ons het ons huiswerk gedoen
vir n hele 2 jaar lank want ons val nie onder die wat net op die vliegtuig
geklim het nie,so ons is nie van daardie mense wat net halsoorkop in die
ding gespring het nie.Jy kan soveel huiswerk doen as wat jy wil as jy nie
self hier was nie en met sommige omstandighede hier moet saamleef nie,glo
my ons was genoeg op internet. Ons het ook klaar ons PR gekry.Jy se dat
ons nie op internet geweet het van die weer nie,ons het,en ons het ook
gese nes baie ander eerder die bad weer as die crime in SA.Veiligheid is
beslis belangriker as geld ek stem met jou saam,maar eet is belangriker as
veiligheid,ons ken mense hier wat gesmag het na n ordentlike bord gekookte
kos,my mening is,as jy gesukkel het in SA kan jy dit maak,maar as jy
gewoond was aan iets, gaan jy sukkel,ja en nou weet ek julle gaan se dis
die snobs wat so se,moenie eens waag om my n snob te noem nie,want julle
het n nuwe woord hier aangeleer waarmee julle die wat teruggaan en wil
teruggaan mee aanval,soos die berig in die beeld n paar maande gelede.Ek
bly nie eens in Brown bay nie.

En weet jy wat my pa was ook hier en het die vinnigste van ons almal werk
gekry,maar is soos n ------ behandel,hy het alles ingesit om dit te
probeer maak,het soos n nat hoender elke aand by die huis gekom,met
stukkende hande wat baie salf nodig gehad het,deur dit alles het hy nog
gaan werk,ONS MOET DIT MOS MAAK WERK,hy het sy werk gelos nie omdat hy nie
meer kon aangaan nie maar omdat hulle teen hom gediskrimineer het,maar
jy't seker nog nie daardie ondervinding gehad nie,baie is seker gelukkig
in hulle werk maar daar is baie wat nie gelukkig is nie,het julle al
gehoor die kiwi's is sulke laid-back mense,dis nie waar nie,sekeres seker
maar die mense werk hulle gatte af.Baie s-afrikaners bly stil oor dinge
wat hier gebeur want hulle is bang om aan hulle familie te admit hulle het
n fout gemaak,ek het dit self aan die begin gedoen,jy's seker nie een van
hulle nie,sal nie weet nie,ek is jammer ek wil jou ook nie aanvat nie,maar
ek het die laaste tyd met vreeslik baie s-afrikaners te doen gekry,van
hulle al jare hier,diskriminasie is dalk jou voorland of dalk nie,ek wil
maar net die mense se dat dit wel hier bestaan.My swaer het ook hier
gewerk en daar is vir hom gese hy is n african dick(jammer vir die
woord),hy het ook nie lank gehou nie,want my magtig jy het genoeg ander
dinge waarby jy moet aanpas,jy wil nie nog met sulke twak by jou werk
sukkel nie.Ek het vir n maand gewerk en was baie gelukkig daar en het geen
probleme gehad nie.(darem iets positief)

My seun is 15,baie goed aangepas in die skool,ons was so bly daaroor want
ja ons was ook soos baie ander bang die kinders gaan nie aanpas nie.Die
aanpas wat hy moes deur maak was n hele ander storie,want hoe moes hy
aanpas as hy amper gesteek was met n skroewedraaier in die skool,hoe moes
hy aanpas as hy nie eens kon gaan fliek sonder dat die skoolgangsters hom
treiter nie,een aand is ons af strand toe,dan moet ek se nie een van die
strande waar jy al gehoor het' moenie daar kom nie want dit is nie so
veilig daar laataand nie'daar aangekom om die rustigheid te geniet,maar
ons was seker 10 min daar toe moes ons maar ry,omdat die selfde gang ons
motor met bottels bestook het,weereens hoe moet hy aanpas as hulle elke
liewe dag met my kind wou baklei,hy was n senuwee wrak en ek moes hom na n
dokter toe vat,ja ek weet in SA kan erger dinge gebeur maar die feit is
die is nie SA nie,dit bly nog steeds veiliger hier,maar jammer ek kan nie
dat my kind n kluisenaars lewe hier voer nie,ons het dan juis hierheen
gekom vir ons kinders se vryheid en veiligheid,wat hy beslis nie hier
gehad het nie.Ek het die skool tale male gaan sien,maar daar is op n
staduim vir my gese,ons moet hom maar reg voor die skool optel en sorg dat
hy in die huis bly die vakansie.

Dit gaan nie net oor jou permit wat moet hernu word nie,die mense sukkel
om n job offer te kry,jy moet n job offer he voor jy n werspermit kry.Wie
van die mense wat so op die site is het al vir ons mede s-afrikaners laat
weet van die resessie,want dit is nie meer so maklik om werk te kry
nie,die land kyk eerder na hulle eie mense as wat hulle na s-afrikaners
sal kyk(wat te verstane is).Ons het ook ondervinding opgetel net soos jy
het,maar die verskil is ek noem die positiewe en die negatiewe hier,jy net
die positiewe,ek laat my nie vertel jy het nog nie met een s-afrikaner te
doen gekry wat volkome gelukkig is nie,baie van hulle praat hulle self
moed in.Baie op die site het ook al gese dit vat jou so 2 jaar om aan te
pas,nee jy pas nie aan nie,jy raak gewoond aan jou lewe hier.My man moes
sy hele menswees hier verander,hy' s n baie spontane mens,vol grappe,as jy
hier n grap maak kyk hulle jou aan met n oop bek(wat gaan met jou aan)ons
het ongelukkig nie op internet gelees dat jy jou hele menswees moet
verander nie.Hier is mense wat al 3 jaar hier bly en enige tyd sal
teruggaan,maar nie kan nie,ek voel vreeslik jammer vir hulle.Die wat
regtig gelukkig hier is,ek wens regtig al daardie positiewe dinge wat met
jou gebeur het,het met ons ook gebeur ,dan sou ons ook gebly het, ek weet
hier is mense wat gelukkig is ook,maar die wat voorgee,drop die act
asb.Ons gaan bang wees in SA maar gelukkig wees in ons harte,wat help dit
om veilig te voel maar elke dag n ongelukkige hart.

Vir die wat oppad is alle sterkte ons hoop uit die diepte van ons hart
julle gaan gelukkig wees hier.

Ek wou nie my mening lig op die site vir almal om te lees nie,maar jy het
gevra,hoop nie jou familie worry oor julle nie,maar after all hoef hulle
mos nie oor julle te worry nie,die belangrikste is dat julle mos veilig
is.Die wat ons dalk gaan sleg se as ons terug is in SA,so what, ons het
die guts gehad ,ons is nie spyt oor die ervaring nie al was dit hoe
moeilik,maar ek weet van baie wat uit hulle velle gaan spring,en ons gaan
beslis ons mede s-afrikaners en vriende en familie meer waardeer,ons vat
darem iets goeds van hier af saam terug,waardering, so ons kan nie se ons
het niks uit ons ervaring hier geleer nie.

Groete
Annemarie


Makes one wonder how such a drastic turnaround could happen within a month. Maybe a case where the husband and wife are not singing from the same songsheet. What it does illustrate is that emmigration is a serious step and both partners should be absolutely sure that they want to do it. Can you imagine the cost and trauma involved in this failed experiment.

[Nolan]

Maybe I am speaking too soon, as we have only been here for 4 months, but in the time I have been here I have chatted to quite a few families that have since left or are about to leave. The reasons they have are all real and valid, but not all based on clear thought.

After meeting some of them I have thought to myself that if I was in their shoes I would leave too, with others I have thought to myself that they have lost touch with reality and will probably regret leaving, others I have realised that they actually haven't done their homework and didn't qualify in the first place and are now just dishing up all sorts of excuses to "justify" the move back to SA instead of admitting that they didn't do their homework in the first place.

Although we are all here because we wanted / want to leave SA, I don't think that anybody here has painted NZ with the rosy brush. Everybody on SA Going To NZ that is in NZ tells it like it is so that there are "no surprises" when you arrive. It is however a fact that while still in SA you tend to ignore the things in NZ that are bad because the things in SA are worse and you need to justify your move in the first place.

It is terribly important that folks don't do that. You need to REALLY sit down and think about the bad things of NZ BEFORE you leave, without the tinted glasses on and ask yourself : can I live with this when I am feeling homesick / settled or is it gonna drive me up the wall and make me up and leave. This is where your lists of what is good about SA and NZ as well as bad about SA and NZ are gonna help you keep things in perspective. In my final year in SA I recorded Carte-Blanche every Sunday night specially to give me an unbiased reminder of why I left. I can now compare what was to what is.

In the article the lady talks about being discriminated against, now I obviously don't know her from a bar of soap so cannot comment on her situation and have no intention to, but I want to recount an episode I witnessed the other day that had me fuming :
I was looking for a dentist as I had chipped my tooth and needed it repaired. I was riding around looking for somebody that could fix it that same day as it was one of my front teeth and didn't feel like walking around like a faalie for a couple of days. The one dentist I walked into had a SA receptionist, probably in her 50's. Hearing she was Afrikaans I switched to Afrikaans as I knew she would appreciate it. She then proceeded, in English - with at least two Kiwi colleages around, to tell me how useless these Kiwis are and how much she misses SA and how different things are here, blah blah. I was so embarrased because I could see the reaction on her Kiwi co-workers faces. It was also obvious that she didn't come here willing to adapt. I just thought to myself : how dare you do this in front of them when they have given you the opportunity to live in their country. I can only imagine what her co-workers were thinking.

If I was in SA and a Polish (as a silly example) immigrant did that in front of me, I would sure as hell make his life so miserable that he hates the country and hopefully leaves. If you are being discriminated against at work it is probably because you either deserve it or because somebody before you deserved it and you are unfortunately taking the slack for it or they are scared you will out perform them. It is then up to you to prove yourself and earn their respect or ignore them and out perform them anyway. Being condescending and windgat like this lady was is not on and not welcome here.

I don't care how much qualifications or work experience or money you have, if NZ gives you the opportunity to come and stay here you need to fit in with THEIR way of doing things. That is the choice you make out of your own free will. If you don't like it or are not prepared to do it, rather don't come or rather leave, because you make life hard for those around you.

Then I met another family the other day who are also leaving. The wife wants to hold seminars in SA when they are back in SA to tell everybody that NZ is k and that emigration agents only lie to you to get your money etc. Chatting to the husband a short while later he gives me the REAL reasons they are leaving - they were used to making a heck of a lot of money in SA and he has more possibilities in SA than NZ in his line of work, so staying in NZ is financially a huge step back. Now why would the wife go and trash NZ and folks, like myself, that are trying to earn an honest living when that is not the real reason they are leaving? Although I fully understand and support their REAL reason for leaving, it irks me the way it is being done. I can only imagine the damage the wife is going to do in SA when she puts folks off coming to NZ and then crime, etc. hits the families that have now decided to stay because of her "first hand advise". If coming to NZ and driving a brand new Mercedes and living in a house right on the beachfront is not good enough, then I don't know.

Straight up : if you come to NZ, you need to do it with a LOT of determination to make it work, a touch of humility at being given the opportunity, a willingness to change (this is NOT SA) and the guts to admit the real reasons if NZ is not for you and you decide to leave.

If you do it that way, you will have my full support

[Clarikdeens]

Well said, Nolan.

If you fail to plan, then you plan to fail, it is as simple as that.

You have to get your mindset right, and in order, BEFORE tackling anything as big as a move to another country and culture. Don't fight them, join them. That way life will be much sweeter. This way your body language will tell the Kiwis that you are happy to be with them. If your body language is negative then you are looking for trouble with the Kiwis, and anybody else for that matter.

It cannot be said enough - do your HOMEWORK long before leaving.

[soniag]

Ai tog some people... Yeah some people just are too proud to admit in making a mistake.

Well I haven't posted for a while as I was on a holiday in George to visit Mother in law. 

Any ways.  We have done our homework.  As a matter of fact I've been researching NZ since 2005 already.

We have come to the conclusion that at this stage we are better of here than in NZ. We live in a town with practically no crime. Hubby has a good salary we have a great house which is a "home" to us. 

If the schools dont work out I will homeschool. Whatever we've decided that wherever we go there is obsticles to overcome.

I have also come to realize that I love this country with my innermost being, and I will be able to part with it for a while but not for ever.  Call me foolish if you want, that is just how I feel.

I've never thought I'd feel this way but it was such a wake up call for me to realize that this is how I feel and we are blessed to live where we do.

So if this is making any sence I dont know.  I just realized that packing up and putting ourselves in a worse position would be foolish, and in retrospect we actually have no reason to leave, and whatever obsticles this place has to offer, we have to overcome.

I can understand the people living in some of our cities wanting to get out.  I honestly would probably want to go then too if I was them.  But we are truly blessed in being in this situation and not prepared to change it right now.

Maybe later.....

[itbjcm]

You have said it Clarikdeens and Nolan!  It's all about mindset and attitude.  If you walk around here sulking (want to say it in Afrikaans: met 'n jammergat houding), feeling that you do not really belong here, talk about SA 24/7 and what not, then it is going to show in the way you handle every situation.  You have as much right to be here as anybody else and as much right to enjoy the same respect as anybody else, BUT you also have a responsibility to show some respect and lift you chin and look people in the eyes.  Don't be arrogant but be confident in the knowing you are just as part of NZ as the person who was born here.

Someone once said that you must never emigrate to another country out of fear, but go because there is something in that other country that attracts you.  We did leave out of fear but also because NZ has unique qualities which attracted us a lot and I think that person was right.  Something just agrees with us here and we are extremely happy in NZ.   It goes far far beyond just safety!  It goes along with a deep appreciation for life and connecting on a deeper level with people. 

Good luck on all the decisions!

[mandyh]

We came over in full "cowboy" style - sold up everything to come over and make a real go of NZ.  We expected it to be really hard and were prepared to adapt to NZ ways in life.  We've been here for 11 months now and would never swop it for SA again.  It took us 2 stressful months to find jobs, another stressful 6 weeks to get our work permits and still stressing about getting our PR but our general way of life is so much more laid back and enjoyable here.

We haven't found a big adjustment necessary to fit into the Kiwi way at all.  We have our SA friends as well as Kiwis.  We get along with all.  Not against SA as such (except what the government has done to a beautiful country!!) and certainly not against NZ in any way.

Our kids have fitted in fine too.  My son has such an active life here - always out and busy with friends. 

Overall we are so happy here compared to in SA.  Even though in SA we were not in a high crime area we are still enjoying it here.

No matter what Immigration has to say on this side - we'll fight them to the end to allow us to stay in this wonderful country.

[Nolan]

Good on you Sonia, you have then made the correct decision.

[ronaldd]

ek stem saam met annemarie in die eerste stuk.

Ek stem saam oor die discriminasie,  en dan suid afrikaners soortvan as tweede klas mense gesien word.  dis waar.. veral die ouer geslag wat glo die mense wat inkom gemors is en hulle vir jou 'n favour doen.... f hulle ons gaan aan. 

Net so tussendeur.     Die ding oor die lag en die manierre.  Die mense hier kla dat nuwe immigrante nie will integreer nie.  Maar ek is ook 'n persoon wat hou van grappe maak.  Dit hou die geestes toestand goed.  Die mense moan oor *** hier en glo die wereld kom tot 'n einde maar will niks weet van hoe geweldadig SA is nie, en dat hulle eintlik nie weet van 'n slegte lewe nie. hulle kla oor snert en lag nie sommer nie want volgens sommiges hier, is dit nou 'n rowwe tyd wat NZ deurgaan.   Ek dink nie hulle weet wat rof is nie.  Ek maak nogals baie grappe maar ek weet nou al ,  hulle lag nie.  maar raai wat.  Ek groet nie mense wat my nie terug groet nie,  so dit werk mooi uit.  As hulle nie aanstoot vind nie dan maak dit mos nie saak nie..

Kom ons wees nou maar eerlik.  Die is nie soos by die huis nie.  Waar mens kon voorstel dat ons vir 'n xmas party maar 'n braai gaan hou en kinders en familie laat kom en ' paar biere drink.... nee nee. nie hier nie.  ons is maar net anders... en op 'n punt dink ek ek gaan maar ophou probeer saam met hulle leef en begin soek vir mense wat dieselfde waardes en gewoontes as ek het.

[Happy Expat]

Hey guys, I haven't been saying much on here for a while either?? Busy with all the xmas activities at the school etc???

Well said to all above

This is my 2c worth....

We left SA out of fear and chose the UK because my hubby had a british passport, so we thought it would be the easiest and quickest  way out of SA. I have always wanted to go to the UK to see the rolling hills and little country cottages etc, so I was excited. Scared out of my mind, but excited! We left and had all good intentions of making a good go of it. From the beginning it was a nightmare. My visions of the UK were destroyed from the second I got off that plane. I don't have enough time or space to explain it all, but trust me we hit rock bottom, financially and emotionally, but we didn't want to give up. We accepted that immigration is not for sissy's and battled on. things looked up a bit after 3 years and we were finally getting by, and had bought ourselves the only home we could afford, which was an ex-council, one bedroom flat on the first floor, but we realised that that was it and there was no way we would do any better. Even though hubby was so qualified, they didn't seem to see his potential and even after change of jobs, it didn't help that the general attitude of people is so negative and the weather is so bad. We started talking about how something needed to change. We knew that SA had gotten much worse since we left and there was no way we were gonna go back!!
So we started looking at our options. We decided that we had to move to a different area, but that wouldn't solve the weather or the attitude around us (plus, a few other things), so it had to be another immigration. We had no idea how we would even afford the tickets, let alone everything else. As luck would have it my MIL found a spot in her heart that felt bad for us and after many attempts to get us back to SA she finally agreed to pay for our tickets and loan us some money Trust me, this is not something she does, ever!! Talk about meant to be

Anyway, after 4 and a half hellish years in the UK, we finally moved to NZ and we started off with our 3 bags and $5000, Plus all the lessons we had learnt from moving to the UK. (the flat was put on the market and due to us being in NZ and the council messing us around, we lost the flat. The bank took it, and that was gonna be our deposit for something here )
Now 3 years down the line and we are still very happy here in NZ. Yes, we are are mouning about the same things the kiwi's moun about, but we are still happy and greatful
We have made lots of friends (still don't know any girls that like trucks and mud like I do though ) and have joined our local 4WD club. We get to see places of NZ that not many do and have fun at the same time. We get together with our SA friends for braai's to have that familiarity that we need to stay in touch with who we really are, but it's good to hang out with the kiwi's and try figure them out too

I get really annoyed when I speak to SAn's or just hear things like what Nolan heard at the dentist. That negative attitude. You do have to realise that this is there country and that they were here first. They have run things thier way for years and it works for them. Who are we to come here and tell them they are doing it all wrong? Look at the mess our country is in. I think it's best we just keep our mouths shut

Life is way to short, just get out there and live. Enjoy life. Life is what you make it, it's all about choices, if you choose to live in NZ or any country, you need to make it work or move on, but don't sit and wallow in self pity. It's not healthy Making mistakes is part of life, so why feel embarrassed, just accept it and try change it

The strange thing for us is, we still miss things about SA and wish that one day there will be a miracle and we can all go back home to the SA, yet lately hubby and I have found that there are things about the UK we miss too
NZ is not perfect, but then no country is. You need to remind yourself, that you chose this country, so it's up to you to make it work

Boy, I've rambled, but this has been a big topic around us lately and it is definatley all about attitude and opinions

[Feather]

Well said all of you! 

Soniag you have made a decision that is right for you, good on ya 

I must say we are settling in nicely.  DH has found it hard to settle into work here, the laid back style that they have in industry, there attitude of 'tomorrow is another day'.  Yet he is one of the team and is involved in every thing that happens.  He even joined their social club to get more involved and meet more kiwis.

Yes there are things that we find difficult to get our minds around, then we have to remember that they have their own ways of handling things here.
And we would rather be here than in JNB. 
DH just told my sister last night that there life is not about money but about quality of life and family time.  Which we never had in SA, quality family time, as DH was always working - call outs, break downs etc.  At least here he has weekends with us and we are bonding more as a family than we had in SA.

We have made friends with other SAffers who have recently moved from the West Coast and needed friends.  We have also made friends with a family from... mother is American, father is German.... Australia.... so far neither of these friends has had a bad word to say about NZ.

Make my heart  to hear other SAffers running NZ down.  We all chose to come here.  No-one ever said that it was going to be easy, but we have to give it a good go.... and we won't be judged by any one if we were to go back, because we did what we thought was right at the time. And we still do 
The children are doing really well at school.  The principle of the primary school stopped me this morning to find out if my DS had settled in and how we were finding the travelling from Redwood to Bryndwr every day.  She showed a genuine interest in DS.  And gave me some good advice for getting my younger DS school ready. 

When I look back at the first post and read how her son is being terrorised by gangs at school I think it has a lot to do with where they have settled.  I don't know where they are.
We were lucky when we moved to Chch, my school friend's hubby advised us on areas not to even consider, and he should know, he grew up here.
Through Sue and Billy we are meeting new people. 

We are still enjoying all the NZ has to offer  and we do look back at SA and miss the familiar things..... we are starting to make some things here familiar to us 

Well that's my 2c worth.

[Werner]

Good on you Happy.  Immigration is not for sissies!!! My family and I miss SA but this is our live now and we will make this work! 

[Feather]

Good on you, Werner. 

[mandyh]

Excellent posts Linda & Heather - we feel the same way.

PS Linda - I'm a lady and I love trucks and mud!! Just a pity we live so far away from you guys...

[Happy Expat]

Mandy, you should never have told me that, now I'm gonna nag you to move down here

[magusta]

bah - if you're unhappy, go back to SA  Last I heard there's lots of other unhappy people there

Life is what you make of it - You decide your attitude If money is important, why not look at Dubai? It's safe there too...just don't whinge about the decision you made. Once you're back in SA, don't even think about complaining about crime,bee and so on - remember it was your choice to live in that environment.

It really chaps my khaki's when people dont take responsibilty for their actions then end up blaming everything and everyone around them for their inability to adapt/change...

I'll go back to SA, for 3 weeks and then i'll head home which is NZ
[flame on]