Advice and Support for South Africans Immigrating to New Zealand

South Africans Going To New Zealand

Author Topic: Returning Saffers  (Read 3125 times)

Offline Nolan

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #15 on: April 30, 2007, 08:49:58 pm »
Although I still feel that once you leave SA there should be no turning back, greenfamily are right in saying that we should not judge those that do decide to come back. There are many reasons folks come back - missing family too much, loss of a loved one, deciding that NZ is not for them, etc.

I wouldn't want a member who does want to return to SA to feel that they would not get the support from us that they deserve, even though we may totally dissagree with their reasons for returning.

Offline Happy Expat

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #16 on: April 30, 2007, 09:49:43 pm »
When we decided that England just wasn't for us, we were treated so badly by other SAn's :'(
They called us all sorts of names etc and we found that very difficult :'( Now that we are happier and I have let those same people know, they are just refusing to speak to us, so no it's not nice, but we know we made the right decision for us ;)


SA Going to NZ Advice Forum

Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #16 on: April 30, 2007, 09:49:43 pm »

Offline Nolan

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #17 on: April 30, 2007, 10:34:59 pm »
A good friend will support you even if he knows it means never seeing you again.

Offline zatexnz

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #18 on: May 01, 2007, 03:01:24 am »
I have one friend who was in NZ for six weeks and hated it.  They're now in Oz.  But even though they settled in Oz, she went through major depression and needed clinical help.  Yet she's happy in Oz in general. 

One has to keep an open mind toward ones own situation as well as others'.
lekker sweet as, y'all
~ Colleen

brad77

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #19 on: May 01, 2007, 06:05:24 am »
I find it very hard to understand people who "hate" a wonderful place like NZ. I think many people are not ready to leave South Africa and will hate whereever they go to. But I suppose I must not be judgemental. :tickedoff: because I tend to be really blunt. I will readily give directions to the closest airport if you are not happy. Naughty me!

Offline Happy Expat

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #20 on: May 01, 2007, 06:25:22 am »
Brad, the one person that was really nasty to us, was like that about the UK :confused: He couldn't understand why I hated it there :-\
It's just a case of different strokes, you can't "make" people like the same things you do, it's tough I know ;) I can't understand why people don't all love and respect horses (all animals) like I do and often wish I could just force them to be more like me ;)  :whistle:O0


Offline Johan01

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #21 on: May 01, 2007, 07:56:11 am »
The one thing people should realize before leaving is, there is no utopia, it will be stressfull, you will have to make adjustments in your life and the way you live your life. This will impact on you, your spouse, your children, your family staying at home (SA), even on your beloved pets. Once have a negative family member the stress of leaving will go up.

Luckily Jolene and I have wonderful parents and even thou they are going to miss us, they support us. My Mom has travelled the world and she is down here the biggest support we have, assisting with advice on what to expect and what not to ... how to emotionally cope with the decisions we make and even help putting decisions we make in perspective and measuring them up to the possibility of positively execute them.

Apart from that it is of utmost importance that your relationship with your spouse must be on top level, one small misunderstanding can be turned into disaster under stressful situations.

So this move of us are being brainstormed day by day, earlier discussion upturned and replaced by new ones, but always together. I give some Jolene give some eg. I wanted to take along my woodworking tools which I acquired during the years, I love woodworking, but to take it with bring more problems on us, so I let it go for us. Jolene did the same and then we discuss whether each of us has a regret in subcumed to the decision. And by that way we are making sure that we really want to move and that we are ready for it.

You have to bring in the kids with decisions, although you might think they actually don't have much of a say or they don't really understand the whole issue, it will affect them in a great way. We surf the schools in NZ show them the pictures, get them to speak English using the NZ words, helping us to look at homes, cars and whatever. Telling them about flying in a plane looking at Maori culture and the ways the different cultures mixes in NZ even the culture toward land and the environment. So what we trying is to get them in a frame of mind for the transition.

All this is taking up most of our time now a days but we feel it important to be emotionally and  psychologically prepared.

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #21 on: May 01, 2007, 07:56:11 am »

Offline Nolan

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #22 on: May 01, 2007, 09:20:15 am »
Well, Johan, you guys couldn't be doing things better than you are.  O0  O0

Offline Marilize

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #23 on: May 06, 2007, 09:54:36 am »
Don't know if I mentioned this somewhere else, but I met a Kiwi living in Australia the other day who told me that NZ is like a rosebush - very pretty to look at but very hard to live off!  That really is true to a large degree.  It is beautiful, clean and certainly vastly safer than SA.  We went to a public park this morning - huge grounds with ponds, ducks, a little mini-train, hiking trails, a gazillion jungle gyms and the cutest playground equipment - all perfectly maintained and painted.  All this in town and for free.  That's pretty priceless.  However, I think SAns are very aware of how our quality of life is impaired by crime, but less aware of the fact that our standard of living is skyhigh compared to many other countries.  I think maybe a lot of people leave because they feel they have no choice and then get here only to find that they start at the bottom and stay there indefinitely.  We're all prepared to start at the bottom financially, but for how long can you stay there?  We've met or heard of several people who either lost their jobs or were demoted after arriving, so they're still struggling to make ends meet.  Out of the immigrants that we've met, most don't like their jobs.  Also, SAns are renowned for our seasonal depression - that's why we don't like living in London.  We're now in a town with 9 months of overcast, windy, rainy weather and while I'm fine with it now I don't know that I won't go off my rocker halfway through winter!  ;)

Don't get me wrong - I'm here, happy to bits to be here and fully intend to stay.  However, I have seen and heard enough to think that going back after a couple of years is not a decision that is made lightly and certainly one that I would feel great empathy with.
M


Offline Johan01

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #24 on: May 06, 2007, 10:03:09 am »
It is a question of attitude. In SA we're use to big houses big this big that almost as trying to Americans. For us it's the simple things that count, the safety the prospects of your childrens future. Of course you have to live sort of comfortable, but what is camfotable for one is not neccessarily comfortable for the other. We are taking an emargency fund, plus we'll have some in SA on which we can draw at a later stage. So through that we are trying to ensure that financial pressure are kept to the minimum.

Offline Marilize

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Re: Returning Saffers
« Reply #25 on: May 06, 2007, 10:21:58 am »
I think what gets to people is the realisation that they have been here for a year/2 years/however long and are still just keeping their heads above water and getting no closer to buying their own house.   UK immigrants with money to spare do pretty well with the exchange rate, but some other countries (such as SA  :'() take a serious beating.  If you don't have serious savings or a house to sell, you end up using your life savings just to get here. 

The housing market in NZ is tremendously problematic.  People don't earn much yet houses are exorbitant.  the govt is very concerned about the fact that so many people never get into the housing market at all - they just keep renting or boarding forever.  With what little they earn, they struggle to save.  The bit they save can't possibly catch up to the growth in house prices, so the prospect of an own house recedes further every month. 

We should also be OK - we're bringing over enough for a sizable deposit and I'm earning enough to keep us afloat until Jacques gets a job, then we'll be able to save and put some extra into the house to get it paid off.  Having said that, with one good salary and a $100 000 deposit we'll be able to afford a modest house in a decent neighbourhood.  The houses that look like ours did (and we simply had a big old house on a big old stand) are several million dollars here.  It was a bit of a shock for us to see the prices of everyday things like food and to realise that people here really budget every last cent.  If you still have no house and no savings after a couple of years I'm sure it must be hard to stay positive and keep going.  So take note, guys - save up as much as you can!  Any little bit helps  :)