Hi Vonn13, And Welcome!!!
I'm a parent myself, but not of teenagers (yet!). I've also done the immigration thing TWICE and know what it all entails.
Here is my "advice", seeing as you did ask for it.
BUT it's just advice - just my opinion, just a suggestion... so it's up to you to evaluate it, and decide whether it's worth following.
1) As others have mentioned, concentrate on your matriculation. Put ALL your energy into getting really GOOD ... no... GREAT marks for your finals. You have a goal to work towards. With good grades, you will get accepted into tertiary education so much easier.
2) Think really carefully about what you want to study after school. What are you good at, what are your interests. What careers fit that. Then start using your spare time to study up what you need to qualify for those careers. Check out if NZ has that to offer you. Perhaps they don't. Perhaps you will need to look elsewhere - Australia? Canada? UK? USA? You could even start taking out books from the library on those careers, start studying the things necessary for that - There is SO much out there that you could get yourself a head start in whatever line you're interested in - you don't HAVE to wait till you're AT varsity to be able to study what you need for a certain career anymore.
3) If you still have any spare time left are all that
, read up here and on the NZ Gov site about what immigration entails. READ and READ some more. (Or get your DAD to join up here and let HIM read!!)
Start putting a "list" together of the steps needed to be taken in order to immigrate. From your folks' point of you, and from your own (as a student). Get all the facts in an easy to follow "formula". And then present that to your mom. I.e. what needs to be done before submitting EOI, what paperwork needs to be ready, (like birth certificates, etc). What are the chances of getting a job before submitting EOI, and after... etc. etc. perhaps right now, your mom is just not very sure of what all will be needed.
4) Try to understand that generally, it's a lot harder for females to leave their family, friends and familiar surroundings behind, than it is for you guys. We females are very relational. Relationships are very important to us. To leave your parents behind, your life-long friends, and all that is familiar, and to just go into the "unknown", is a huge undertaking for anybody, but especially for mothers. We are responsible for the well-being of our family. For the mental and emotional well-being, while the father is responsible for the physical and financial well-being of the family. For him, it's a case of NZ is safer, and yes you can make money here, and you can survive, so let's go. But for Mom, she doesn't know if she's going to be able to provide the emotional wellbeing for the whole family. It's not just herself, but all of you. THe mother is usually the one that has to be the pillar that holds all together, and if she falls apart, the whole family could fall apart. Depression resulting from immigration is a very real thing, that many (not all!) have to deal with. So try to understand that this is a HUGE decision for her to make.
So where this is all concerned, I'm going to suggest the following: Leave off talking about moving to NZ for the rest of the year. Take the pressure off. Do your studies. Work Hard. Help your folks around the house whenever possible. Show them you love them and appreciate them, whether you stay or go. Do your background investigation (number 2 & 3 above), and then when you've graduated
, sit your folks down, and have a good open-hearted talk to them about it. Give the information you've gathered. And let them make the decisions. Tell them how you feel - perhaps even tell them that you've done the research and you want to study ABC at University PQR in country XYZ. And then leave it with them. Don't even bring up the subject again. Just let it "soak" in.
My guess is that if you and your dad leave off even talking about NZ at all, during the next 8 months, your mother will feel less pressured, and may actually make the decision herself. But the more you push for it and nag her about it, I can almost GUARANTEE that she's going to simply push harder against it, and it will push you apart.
Ok, there. I've said my little piece.
All the best with your endeavours, and we're here to encourage you along the way!!
