Advice and Support for South Africans Immigrating to New Zealand

South Africans Going To New Zealand

Author Topic: What if the kids won't cope?  (Read 1031 times)

Offline Hope2Go2

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What if the kids won't cope?
« on: July 19, 2016, 07:57:26 am »
It so happened that my hubby took a new job in a new town/city in April.  And we have just received our Residence Visas last week.

On the upside, moving in April helped us sort through our stuff and gave us some practice in packing up, going away and starting anew - in a place very similar to where we came from though.

On the downside, my kids (4 and 6 years old) are really struggling to cope with the move.  They moved to another Afrikaans school which is very similar to the one they came from.  Not that they were shiny, happy kids in the mornings when they had to go to their old school, unfortunately.  I guess my kids are particularly bad at adapting to new environments.  Also, they are introverted and need lots of time to warm up in new situations.

This morning when I was taking two little heaps of misery to school, I was wondering whether it is insane for us to want to emigrate.  Wouldn't moving to NZ make all life fizzle out of them?  I should mention that, school issues apart, they are the most amazing, bright, energetic and fun little people ever.  They very seldom fight and are caring, sweet kids.  They bring me more joy than I ever thought possible.

I've made my oldest an appointment with an educational psychologist, hoping that the 'professionals' will know what to do..

We only plan to move to NZ next year, depending on when/if hubby finds a job there.  Here's hoping all will miraculously fall into place..   :-\
Feb 2015 - Submit EOI, selected
Mar 2015 - ITA received
May 2015 - NZ Medicals done
Jun 2015 - PR application submitted
Jul 2015 - Received NZQA Assessment result
Oct 2015 - Case officer assigned
16 Dec 2015:  Residence approved!

Offline Zedd

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Re: What if the kids won't cope?
« Reply #1 on: July 19, 2016, 08:17:41 am »
My personal opinion is that the kids will adapt quicker than adults - they're flexible that way :)
NZ is very child friendly, but I think that that point has been laboured enough.  Come on over for a different life.  All with its ups and downs of fitting into an established society as a newcomer.
18 March 2013 - EOI submitted
3 April 2013 - EOI selected
10 May 2013 - ITA issued
23 July 2013 - ITA submitted
18 Sep 2014 - Resident visas approved
28 Feb 2015 - The chicken has landed!

SA Going to NZ Advice Forum

Re: What if the kids won't cope?
« Reply #1 on: July 19, 2016, 08:17:41 am »

Offline Seeker

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Re: What if the kids won't cope?
« Reply #2 on: July 20, 2016, 09:22:36 pm »
Your kids are young and still very used to mommy being around them all the time. But within the next year they are going to change a lot. This move was probably just what they needed to prepare them for next year, even though it does not feel like it now. But give it a bit of time. Remember you need to be positive. They will feed of your positive attitude.

We had a little girl in our sport club. She was 5 years old when she started training (together with her older brother of about 7/8). Personally I thought she was a little young to start, because she was extremely introvert and only wanted her mommy all the time in the beginning.  :'(  Interaction with mom during the 1 hour training is not allowed, and I think it must sometimes have been very difficult for her mother to watch. But within a year you should have seen how she changed. This little girl became one of the better students in the class and did even better than her brother. She was still very quiet, but when the adults "did not watch", she was often the one to tell other students to get in line and behave.  :clap:  I think being part of the club helped her a lot.

Your kids will be just fine. Don't worry.  O0

   

Offline katiewalters

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Re: What if the kids won't cope?
« Reply #3 on: July 21, 2016, 01:53:52 am »
since we've moved here, I've come across lots of south africans who have moved here with their kids. the kids cope so amazingly and integrate so well. all the kids I've met have been happy as NZ is so well suited for them. the earlier they move, the easier it will be for them too. teenagers seem to struggle but your kids are at a great age for such a big move.

Offline Hope2Go2

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Re: What if the kids won't cope?
« Reply #4 on: July 25, 2016, 08:39:03 am »
Thanks so much, you guys are the best!  I much appreciate your sweet encouragement.   :)
Feb 2015 - Submit EOI, selected
Mar 2015 - ITA received
May 2015 - NZ Medicals done
Jun 2015 - PR application submitted
Jul 2015 - Received NZQA Assessment result
Oct 2015 - Case officer assigned
16 Dec 2015:  Residence approved!